January 17th, 2010
"And he said, 'Come.' Peter went down from the boat, and walked upon the water. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid; and began to sink...He told Peter, 'O thou of little faith, wherefore does thou doubt?' "
After three previous failed attempts to run a sub 3:10, it was time to concede. A year and a half of training religiously had passed, and I only had bettered my PR by five minutes. In fact, my last two consecutive marathons were both 3:13. I just couldn't hold on the last 3-4 miles and cross over.
As the fall running season approached, I reluctantly abandoned my sub 3:10 goal and began training to go sub 3:00. Crazy? That's one way to look at it.
Kierkegaard wrote true faith is not belief in the improbable; even one in a million has a basis in logical possibility. True faith was, "Belief in the absurd." With true faith, I started an 18 week cycle in September to go sub 3:00 in January.
More than anything, I needed a change. After running the exact same routine for five consecutive cycles, it was time for something new.
During the first six weeks I focused on weight, trying to get as light as possible. Already down to 185, I frequently received unsolicited comments like, "Geeze Dave!? That's really not a 'good look' for you." But for 3:00, I knew I was at least 10 pounds too heavy.
In addition to running, I added extra 4-6 mile walks every day. By October, I was down to 177. The reduced poundage would help on race day, but the real benefit was increased training.
At the peak of my previous routines, I ran 65-70 miles a week. That's all my body could handle before aches and pains developed. Now eight lbs lighter, I increased to 85 miles / week with no extra stress. In fact, as the weather turned colder, I was comfortably running daily doubles of 5-6 during lunch, followed by another 12-15 at night.
All my core long runs (18+), were a breeze. The extra running miles combined with the extra walks to further drop my weight down to 174.
Everything was coming together; I was ready for the last piece, a baseline. To date, my best half Marathon was a 1:32:40. To see myself running a sub 3:00, I needed to be tested.
Actually, there were two options. Run a 1:30 half at a nice and comfortable stride, or go all out and do a 1:25-1:26 half, to which a 1:30 would be a comparative trot. I chose the latter.
With four remaining weeks until race day, I entered the 22nd Annual CC American Bank half marathon. The weather was cold, the course flat and familiar. I pivoted at the turn around point on a 1:28 pace; I pushed to finish in 1:29:48. A solid PR. I was in my best conditioning, and very disappointed. Sub 3:10 shape, Yes; Sub 3:00, No.
Fellow runners tried to keep my inspiration up, "You didn't taper." "There was no pace leader." It was no use; my "faith" began to fail.
I succumbed to temptation, and began living a life of sin. It began with venial peccadillos, an office Christmas cookie here or there. By New Years, I was lost. I regained four of the 10 pounds that I labored so hard to lose. True, I was still lighter than ever, but too wide for that "...narrow path that few will choose."
And there I stood race morning with two choices. Go for sub 3:10 again, which I had an excellent chance, or hold to my 3:00 convictions. I queued up next to the 3:00 pacer; the gun fired and we were off.
At the 5k mark, shoulder to shoulder with the pacer. However my breathing was way off, and sweating. I shouldn't have worried. It usually takes 5-8 miles to find a rhythm. But I had so little faith, I "...began to sink."
At 10k, 30 seconds in back of the pacer; 3:00 was out. At mile 8 my quads were a little tight, very disconcerting. The course was flat, and normally my legs don't get heavy until mile 20 or so. But again, already doubtful, I was convinced that I had pushed too hard.
I hit the halfway mark in 1:31:40, a 3:04 pace. Aerobically feeling good, but mentally just waiting to implode. At mile 14 my quads started to burn, and I pulled up. Time to do my penance, 12 long and excruciating miles. Painfully jog a quarter of a mile, walk ten yards. Another quarter, 10 yards. Mile by Mile. At 20, my thighs felt like nails were hammered in them.
I limped across the finish in 3:35:44, placing 809 out of 5,691.
Even had the weather been perfect, it wasn't, I didn't have sub 3:00 in me this day. However with any faith at all, I should have made it to mile 18-20 with the sub 3:00 group. Without a doubt, I could have PRed. But, I still believe it was important to try. Having "seen the light", I am more inspired than ever to keep at it.
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